The Light and Dark Side of the Moon and the Search for Beauty

(At first, I thought about separating this post into two separate posts, but I decided not to. There has to be balance, and I wanted folks to get both at once...)

Producing a major event pretty much requires that for 1-2 weeks leading up to the event, I'm going to curse myself, question my sanity, make my loved ones swear I won't do something crazy like this again, and generally be a ball of nerves. At least it feels that way on the inside, because many have commented to me, "How do you manage to be so calm and focused?" (Because I have a job to do, people are counting on me, and it has to happen is the combo-answer.)

And then the event happens, and everyone is ecstatic and my inbox is flooded with happy messages, and I know that YES, all of that was worth it, and YES I will do it again (and my loved ones are doing nothing to deter this...in fact, they're with me on planning the next thing, maybe it's a conspiracy?).  And yes, Waking Persephone was even better this year, and it blows my mind. But, I don't put on events for me...I put them on because of what it does for the community - my students, my friends, musicians, teachers, performers, vendors, and the venues it supports - and because I do a good job of planning, the event pays for itself.  I see what the event does for everyone, and it makes me happy.  And so it pains me to move Waking Persephone because I know what it does for New England, but logic must win in this case - it's much harder to produce a major event from 3500 miles - BUT I will be doing something back in Rhode Island to fill a bit of that void...more details on that later. Still not an easy decision.

And then the week or two after the event, after my body and brain has had time to recover, there's usually a bit of depression, a void.  But this time, the malaise wasn't so much for the "oh, it's all over...", but that point where I seemed to reconnect with the internet, rather harshly. That the very tactile physical experience of what community really means and feels like, gets a bit lost in the melee of various media onslaught...and it pulled me down. (The upside of being so damn busy is that you often miss a lot of the rigamarole, and so there's a blissful ignorance that comes with the busy.) It's not caused by one person or one discussion, or really anything to do with me personally, but what I see...this is what's being going through my mind lately, in no particular order, and I have covered them in this blog in various ways in the past, but I felt particularly bombarded by all of these online, this week:

!) "Rosemary does indeed grow in the gardens of the wicked." Seeing praise for someone who has a long and active history of stealing, lying, and other unsavory business habits upsets me. It's clear that the person giving the praise has had little exposure with the actual person, only the persona, and it pains me that more people will get hurt by them, but nothing I can do about it (besides not hire or promote them myself).  Is there always another excuse for why something can't be done? If you contribute to something, what do you get back, and are you getting it back in a timely manner? Just because someone puts on the airs of a deity doesn't mean they're divine. Nobody is perfect, keep your eyes open. Trust is earned, not given away.

!) "I'm born again! You're NOT! And you're doing it wrong!" People who come to some drastic realization about their path and their own choices, and then decide that everyone else is also wrong and proceeds to inform everyone how they're doing it wrong. You know, we all do stupid stuff, and it's great to try and educate others, but everyone comes to things on their own, and what worked for you may not be the answer for anyone else.  Be enthusiastic FOR YOU, leave others to focus on what works for them, unless they're paying to learn it from you.  But still, damn it people, you have to be sincere, be honest, be human.

!) "Hissing? No, that's just the sound of my ego inflating..." I love intelligent discussion and debate - where someone asks a sincere question to solve a problem, and everyone has a different solution - ideas get compared, contrasted, shared.  It makes for growth and awesomeness. But I don't get questions posed to get a rise out of people, for the interest of "keeping things going." To point out how others are wrong (in your head/belief), how you disapprove, and then it just gets more ugly from there.  It all stems from personal insecurities, a desire for power/control, and rarely does it do anything beneficial for anybody else. Just spreads around more negativity.  Do we really need more of that?

!) "We're being too nice and that's causing all of the issues." Oh really?  I'm not a fan of blowing rainbows and unicorns up people's arses when they don't deserve it and I'm sick of the popularity machine-games, but there's a time and place for everyone, and "you suck" isn't helpful to ANYONE either.  Why knock a troupe of students who are trying their best at a hafla?  What good does it do to rip apart a group of middle-aged women who may not have the "perfect" figure or the best technique, but enjoy this dance with all their hearts? No, poorly-done fusion doesn't do any good, neither does poorly-done ANYTHING for that matter.  Sitting in front of your computer ripping people apart doesn't solve anything.  You know what does? Knowing what "constructive critique" means - versus criticism, and doing it in the proper setting in the right way - in the classroom, face-to-face, where you can demonstrate and discuss what's working and how to do it better.  It also means learning to be open to receiving it. This is NOT an easy thing, but it can be learned, and contributes to everyone's success.  However, it cannot be done on your arse, hidden away.

!) "I wish, I could never..." Some people who believe nothing is possible, who spout negativity all day long - and you know what? They're right.  Nothing will happen for them, because they refuse to be pro-active in their lives.  You know how I get things done?  I decide I want to do something, and I see about how to make it happen, in small reasonable steps. You want to go to a festival? Make a realistic list of what it will take to happen, and create a timeline.  You want to study with OMG famous dancer? Ok, what will it take to make that happen?  Stop disbelieving everything and thwarting yourself in the process.  Stop it with the negative language and start considering the possible. Your life will improve. For reals.

That's a lot isn't it?  That's almost everything I felt like I got exposed to in the last week, and it just broadsided me.  And then I felt the venom coming out of myself, and it startled me.  Because it's not me, but I was immersed in it, and it all got me down and pulled me deeper.  To go from experiencing the very best of a community and what can happen when everyone comes together, to watching the worst unfold before my eyes, and it hurt me. It had nothing to do with me personally, but the empathy for situation, for those who were, are, and will be hurt.  But it doesn't have to be that way.

Instead, I challenge ALL OF US to search for beauty.  Within ourselves, within others.  One of my favorite definitions of Goth is "to search for beauty, and see it in all things - the traditional, the unusual, the macabre."

I'm not talking about some cosmetic standard of commercial beauty.  I'm talking about respect for oneself and for humanity, a desire to bring about positive change, self-growth, and to compete only with yourself. Bring the beauty out in yourself, and it may in turn bring the beauty out in others. 

I will warn you - it's not easy, and it's rather dangerous...but giving into the negative is even more damaging and dangerous.

April, May, June News!

Samara & Saideh up front being silly,
Tempest & Nathaniel in the back, at Motif!

Just returned from Waking Persephone II  (http://www.wakingpersephone.com) which was just amazing!  The first year was so incredible that I was unsure how the second year would compare, and well, it was phenomenal.  Thanks to all of the dancers, vendors, volunteers who made it possible.  The next one will be in Seattle, shooting for October 3rd-5th, 2014 - possibly with a "Possessing The Dark" intensive right before it.  But we won't be leaving New England entirely - stay tuned for developments for a very special Museum Quality: Art School for Bellydancers event happening April 10th-13th in Providence! 

And now there's some very exciting news, upcoming performances, etc:

April 20th - Shimmy Happens Alternative Hafla, in Lakewood, WA - I will be performing close to 6:30pm: http://aleedra.blogspot.com/2013/04/shimmy-happens-alternative-hafla-sat.html

April 28th - An Evening of Live Music & Dance at the Can Can in downtown Seattle, with myself, The Nathaniel Johnstone Band, Oliver Franklin, and more!  Tickets ARE available for both general admission and VIP (there was a website glitch), but they are going fast and this venue will sell out! http://cancan.strangertickets.com/events/7183846/the-nathaniel-johnstone-band-with-tempest-and-oliver-franklin

And while we're talking about awesome live music - Nathaniel is doing a fundraiser for "Narratives" - his next CD project, which sounds AMAZING. The project is at 60% funded with 11 days to go, so help out an amazing project and get create music, art, and more in the process - details and clips at http://www.nathanieljohnstone.com/fundraiser.html

Now in May: 
Nathaniel and I will be performing (in addition to vending) at Tribal Fest 13 in Sebastopol, CA - 5:02, Saturday the 18th on the main stage - http://www.blacksheepbellydance.com/tf13/index.html and we'll be hosting the official Sunday after-thing, called "Hipdown" - details will be on fb and at http://www.nathanieljohnstone.com this weekend.

The following weekend, we're performing and teaching at Clockwork Alchemy in San Jose, CA - check the schedule for the performances and workshops: http://www.clockworkalchemy.com/

And THEN we're off to Dallas, TX for A-KON - http://www.a-kon.com/?p=2902 and I will be teaching a very special mini-intensive workshop on Saturday, June 1st - limited to only 20 dancers! Details at http://www.darklydramatic.com/dallas-workshop.html

And near the end of June, I'm thrilled to be returning to Tribal Revolution in Chicago, where I will be vending, teaching two workshops, and performing - http://www.tribalrevolution.com 

Whew - ok, think that's everything that's coming up fast!  

blessings, 
Tempest

So what are you waiting for?

There were many sayings in the house I grew up in (that are still used today in fact, by my parents and brothers), and I'm sure they weren't specific to ours alone - perhaps you may even recognize a few. 
Such gems as:
-What? Do you have shares in the electric company? (in response to lights being left on in a room that wasn't being used)
-What do you want, a cookie or a medal? (after one of the kids sought out praise for something they were supposed to be doing anyway)
and
-What are you waiting for, an engraved invitation? (when one of the kids was late to a meal, dillydallying, etc)

Yes, I grew up in a family of smart asses: family gatherings are displays of wit, cunning, and fancy linguistics, and not for the faint of heart or overly sensitive. But for better or for worse, a lot of those sayings have come in handy (especially when paying the electric bill), and the last one I'd like to introduce in terms of bellydance community drama - or more specifically, the avoidance there of.

It comes down to being aware of some simple truths that EVERYONE should take to heart:
-Not everyone knows who you are, what you've done, and where you're going, nor does everyone know what your personal schedule is.
-Event promoters/producers rarely have the capacity to single out every person in their community and personally invite them to participate in the event, especially in large cities.  Nor does having a iron memory generally coming along with the ability to herd cats.

I'm a pretty well-known dancer.  I teach and perform on national and international levels, have been featured on more than half a dozen mass-produced DVDs, headlined major festivals all over the world, and have a pretty strong presence online.  Yet having moved numerous times in my life, particularly 3 major moves in the last 6 years, I don't expect the local community to automatically know who I am, what I do, and invite me to ALL THE THINGS.  Or have them know/realize that where I am now as a dancer/artist/teacher is completely different than where I was 6-7 years ago.  If I did expect all of these things, I'd have a pretty empty schedule, filled only by a ginormous ego. Yeah, no.

So I don't expect them to arrive on my doorstep with flowers and be all "OMG, famous dancer! come to my event!" Instead, when I see an event I'm interested in, I write the promoter, introduce myself, and see about getting involved.  If I had talked to them at a previous event where they suggested things for the next one, I don't wait to for them to remember our conversation 6 months later, find my card, and contact me.  Nope, instead, I'm pro-active, and I contact them in a timely manner.

I think too many dancers live so much in their own heads (and personal infamy) that they fail to realize that not everyone else is keeping track of their every movement, wish, and desire.  I've often heard "Oh, X slighted me by not inviting me to perform/teach at her/his event" where the truth is more like, X is up to their ears in producing said event that they failed to remember or was unable to follow through with contacting the dancer.  I have mad event producing skills, usually tackling what takes a team of people for other events, but there is no way in hell I'm going to remember everything and everyone.  And so I try and take that into consideration when working with other people. 

So what does this mean for you?  If you see a local event you're interested in, but didn't receive an engraved invitation to be a part of it, then get off your hipscarf and contact them.  There's no room left this year for performing or instructing?  See about volunteering or at least showing up to attend the event.  The best way to make a great and lasting impression is not performing at an event, it's being a helpful participant. Nearly every event can use one more pair of helping hands....and sometimes last-minute performance or vending or teaching slots open up. As a promoter myself, I'm more likely to make that extra step for someone if they show they really want to be part of a community and help out.  The folks who show up only to perform and then leave? Or didn't follow simple instructions? No thanks.  The gal who signs up for workshops and also offers to help clean up? Yeap, I want to talk to her.  There are 10 slots, but 20 amazing dancers? I will remember who showed up anyway, even though they didn't get a slot - or expect them to send me a note along the way.

It's not about putting up a front of being nice, it's about understanding the energy that it takes to make an event happen as well as putting the REAL YOU out there.  People who really want to be a part of things for the right reason will stand out.  The fakers and the divas? They fade away. 

Want real community?  Drop being so jaded and judgmental, deciding that everyone is out to get you/slight you (well, unless you ARE a total bitch, then yeah, maybe they are, or more specifically are avoiding your lame ass.) 

Don't miss out on great opportunities because your engraved invitation didn't arrive.  It takes courage to put yourself out there, but it's so worth it. 

Better than sitting at home with your ego any day.

Upcoming Events in Feb & March!

While it's been quiet on the surface the last month and a half, been very busy moving into a new place, getting situated and putting things into motion.  In the next few weeks, online lessons will be up and running - recorded as well as skype!  In addition to that, there's a lot of great things kicking off:

1) I will be teaching a 6 week session of classes here in Seattle at Tin Can Studio starting on Thursday evenings - 7pm is Bellydance Foundation and 8pm is Fusion/Performance Fundamentals - only a few spots are left, and I will only be teaching classes when I can put 4-6 weeks together consecutively, so take advantage of when I can offer them! Complete info at http://www.darklydramatic.com/classes.html

2) Nathaniel Johnstone and I will be presenting/performing/teaching at FaerieCon West in Seattle this Saturday, February 23rd: 

1:00-1:45pm: Dreaming the Raven: A Morrigan Dance Ritual
Experience a performance ritual dance presentation inspired by the mythical aspects of the Raven and the Morrigan, featuring the dancing of world-renown fusion performer Tempest and live music by multi-instrumentalist Nathaniel Johnstone. The performance will be followed up with discussion about the ritual presentation, including the myths that inspired it, the incorporation of dance and ritual, improvisation, and the creation of the music. Market Stage - Ballroom Foyer – Level 3 (free with FaerieCon admission)
3:00-4:30pm Sigils in Motion: Merging Movement With Ritual
Ritual is a dynamic union of self and spirit, above and below—so why should it be static? Learn to incorporate movement into your ritual with focused intention and discover a much more powerful experience. With dancer Tempest and musician Nathaniel Johnstone as your guides, you’ll explore the key parts of several rituals and how actively discover how different sacred movements, gestures and dance steps can be applied to enhance your spiritual practice– for groups and covens, as well as solitary practitioners. $30, Faerie Academy class, James and Marion Suites – 4th Floor - register at http://faeriecon.com/west/participate/faerie-academy/

3) Angels & Absinthe II, St. Louis, MO, March 8th-10th - teaching and performing workshops, along with Nathaniel Johnstone, The Ghosts Project, Secondhand, Il Troubadour and more! - great for ALL styles of bellydance! http://exoticrhythms.com/EXOTICRHYTHMS/?page_id=346

4) Art of The Belly Festival, Ocean City, MD, March 22nd-24th - teaching and performing and vending! Details at http://www.artofthebelly.com/ 
  
5) Cues & Tattoos Festival, Seattle, WA, March 27th-30th - performing in the Saturday Night Serpent's Muse Show, and vending Sat/Sun with Tin Can Studio. Details at: http://www.troupehipnotica.com/cues/

6) And just beyond in April, Waking Persephone II happens again in Providence, RI - April 11th-14th - The East Coast's Dark/Experimental Bellydance Event.  Details at http://www.wakingpersephone.com

There are even more exciting things planned for the rest of the year, visit my website for the whole schedule!

Thanks so much!
Tempest  

Dark Inspirations: New Developments for 2013

Truly, there is no rest for the wicked.  Just days after getting back from teaching a 3 day-long Museum Quality Intensive in Indianapolis last weekend, still recovering from the satisfied exhaustion of a great workshop weekend, my brain has kicked off into high-gear about new projects for 2013. 

First off, we are coming up on the 10 year anniversary of The Gothic Bellydance Resource. The site has been in major need of a complete overhaul and update for quite some time, and it's finally going to get it.   All new content, new features, videos, galleries, and links - and if you're a dancer, artisan, or event producer who specializes in the darker styles of bellydance - stay tuned for how you can get involved and get featured on the website.

Next: a new dance intensive from me, which is designed to be the most complete and extensive learning experience for Gothic/Ritual/Dark Fusion bellydance anywhere: Possessing The Dark: Spirit, Body, & Mind.  20+ hours over 3 days which will lead dancers through the complete process of truly mastering darker styles of bellydance. As I have said many times before, it's not just about the make-up costuming, and it's not just about the movements and music, and it's not just about telling a dramatic story - it is the successful combination of all of these elements channeled with introspective energy that makes this beautiful art-form so mesmerizing, captivating, and powerful.

And then, to top it all off with awesomeness, the intensive will also be made into a 3 DVD set (estimated to be 9-12 hours of material) + a compilation CD of music.  Now, it won't be the same experience as the intensive, as there are many exercises that do not translate into DVD effectively nor does anything surpass a one-on-one live instructional situation, but it will be the most comprehensive collection of instruction on the subject available on DVD.  More details on the DVD Project to come in February/March!

So that's a bit of what's in store!

Truth of Line

One of the things that being an artist has taught me, is that everything is illusion and everything is also truth.

Yes.  You read that correctly.

All visual art is about recreating a truth in the world - and that recreation is never the actual object/being/place/person - it is a representation of it, an interpretation, and since it is not the actual thing, it is also an illusion - a network of lines and colors, dots and surface.

But that does not make it a lie.  Our own experiences, our interpretation of what we see, touch, and feel, our attempt at translating it, is also truth.  Truth to ourselves at least, though outside of that can be debatable.

So what does that have to do with dance?

Good question.  I will explain, but first a story!

I have attended numerous art classes throughout my entire life, from age 3 through now.  One of the ones I remember with great clarity was when I was 6, and we were tasked with making a drawing a still life of a candle in a holder. Rather than drawing the outline of the candle and the holder, the instructor said to me, as I remember it: "Break down the object into the shapes you see. So if that base there is an oval, you will draw an oval - but don't just draw one oval - allow your hand to make multiple ovals on the paper until you find one layer you are satisfied with.  Then chose that one as the best one to use to make your shape." I don't remember who the instructor was (though I remember many others throughout the years), but that concept struck deeply within my head and defined how I drew from that point on. 

But I didn't consciously realize it until about 10 years later, where I was auditioning to attend the South Carolina Governor's School for the Arts.  You had to present a portfolio to several instructors during an interview, and then were observed in a drawing class.  As I drew the still-life, one of the teachers I had interviewed with looked over my shoulder, made a noise, left, and came back with another instructor, and they observed my drawing (no pressure guys!).  After a few minutes, he excitedly said, "You draw just like Alberto Giacometti!" He would later explain in greater detail when I attended the school the following summer - the distinct use of building depth in a drawing through multiple lines, varying the density and application of the line to create light and dark, defining the positive and negative space within the network of lines.  I hadn't really thought about why I drew the way I did, so it was rather validating as a young artist, and enlightening. This view told me every line didn't have to be perfect and clean - that it was the collective effect of them that created the experience.

The next drawing class that impacted me was my freshman drawing class at RISD with Tom Mills. He emphasized the creation of depth through many layers - of drawing and erasing, drawing again, rubbing away, and drawing again.  And upon this surface, making a strong commitment to the line, or the absence of it. It wasn't about having this perfectly white paper with perfectly articulated line that made a drawing "good" - it was about the emotion created, the layers of experience, and skillful interaction of the drawing implement with the surface.

So again, what does this have to do with dance? Everything.

The lines that a visual artist uses to draw are akin to the movements we make with our bodies in dance.  The canvas or paper is equal to the earth or stage the dance is performed upon. The lines recreate a truth, a journey, an experience in a drawing or painting.  It may be a painting of a vase of flowers, but it will never be the vase of flowers - for better or for worse.  A dance also recreates a truth, a journey, an experience in the same way - it is not the exact thing (a gathering of swans, fated lovers, a warrior in the desert?), but rather the emotional imprint of the thing and our relationship with it.

What does this mean? Why does it matter?  Well, an artist creates for the sake of creation - it is rarely about the finished product so much as it is the process.  It's about being to explore that truth of line as the art is being created - to argue with it, to define it, to obliterate it, and to build it up again.  The end result is successful if the journey is successful. If we allow ourselves to look at dance in the same - about how we create the dance, allow ourselves to explore the lines in all of their variations, rather than trying to strive for "perfection", we will get a lot more out of the process, and in turn, the audience will get a lot more from our dance.  It's not about the hard and fast details, the flash and decor, the branding and style - as it is about who we are on stage, what we have to say, and how say it.  That is the Truth of Line. Don't deceive yourself to believe otherwise, or let yourself be deceived by others - find your own truth first.

And then your dance will truly be YOUR dance.

Your Dance Belief

Stereo Vision Gina Simon-Photography
"Beauty/Beast" at Raven's Night

Every time this year, I tend to write a post about the Winter Solstice - whether it's about the balance of dark and light, or facing the challenges of Winter. This year, I'm going to keep up the timely tradition, but I'd like to write about something that's been on my mind since June when I seemed to have the same discussion with several different sponsors along my tour route, and the holiday season is bringing it to the forefront of my mind again.  And that something is Religion.

Nearly every organized (and disorganized) religion has some sort of celebration this time of year.  There's a lot of talk about the reason for the season, about being PC, not offending anyone, offending everybody, celebrating love, fighting commercialism, who started what tradition and why, and so forth.  And of course, everyone thinks they're right.

And well, the same is true for the bellydance world.  We each (whether we like to admit or not) have our own dance religion. What we believe, how we practice it, what we think others should believe and practice.  And we span the range from fundamentalists and dogmatic practitioners to eclectic reformers and agnostic polytheists. And if you've spent any fair amount of time in the bellydance community, you have probably heard some, if not ALL of the following:

-"Egyptian style is the only REAL bellydance" (or Turkish or Lebanese...)
-"Tribal isn't bellydance." (or Gothic or Fusion...)
-"ATS is the ONLY way to do Tribal right."
-"Tribal style is for REAL women and REAL sisterhood...Cabaret is for sluts and strippers."
-"You can't do both X and Y, you just can't. It's either one or the other."
-"Bellydancing is for women ONLY."
-"X's Style is the only way to have proper technique, if you don't do it her way, your dance is crap."
and so on, and so forth, etc, etc.

Why? Why do people believe/say these things?

I've come to the conclusion that when we come to this dance, we fall in love with it.  And we invest so much of ourselves - our time, our money, our bodies - that it becomes important to believe that you're doing it right, that your investment is worthy.  And let's face it, most people starting out don't even know the complexity they're about to run into. Tribal? Oriental? Canes, Swords, Veils, and Fire? Oh my! How do I know I'm doing it right?

Some people react to the smorgasbord with glee : "I'm going to try it all! Weeee!" but a lot of people cling tighter to what they know and are familiar with - which is a very common human condition: whatever is strange/unfamiliar is possibly sinister/wrong.  Which is a great survival technique, but not a terribly good social/communal one.  There is also an explicable fear of BEING WRONG: "If Betty does Tribal, does that make me wrong for doing American Cabaret, or her wrong for doing Tribal? It does look more authentic, but it's really NOT, so there.."  And then there are instructors who further feed into these fears - whether because they're pushing their own religion, or they're afraid of losing students, or they just hate Betty's guts.

And here's where we come to the amazing thing about religion: It's about your personal relationship between you and whatever your chosen deity/path is.  It has NOTHING to do what what anyone else does. If it works for you, that's awesome.  And it's invigorating to share common beliefs and goals with others. But it doesn't make what anyone else is doing automatically wrong.

Egyptian is the only way for you? That's awesome!  Travel over there, study everything you can - there's a LOT to discover (like different eras, regions, history, and like the overlaps between Lebanese and Turkish). American Tribal Style floats your boat, fills your soul, and makes you stupid happy? Fantastic! Study where it comes from, and see what other variations are now out there and why - it's not blasphemy. Bellydancing helps your connect with your inner goddess and makes you feel empowered and beautiful? Rock on! Just remember, "over there" - EVERYONE does it - children, grandparents, women AND men. And just because some wrote some pretty myths and published them doesn't make it fact. Dancing TWO styles? Well, a lot of professional dancers learn and perform multiple styles of dance - generally through more than a single 6 week class.

I could go on and on, but what I'm saying here is: do what works for you, do it to the best of your ability, WHILE respecting that other people feel the same way about what they do and how they dance.  Learning about and accepting that other forms are valid does NOT invalidate what you believe and practice.  In fact, you may learn something new that expands or builds upon what works for you.  It doesn't make you weak or inferior - rather it's just another one of those things that makes you stronger and a better human being as well.

As teachers, we need to remember that what we share is OUR own experience, our own path.  As students, we have to remember this as well - that we are not only getting that person's experience, but are also filtering it through our own experiences. As performers, we also share our experience with the audience when we dance, and again, they filter it through their eyes and hearts. 

So the next time you may feel threatened by what someone else is doing, or fearful that you may be doing it wrong, relax - take a moment and think about the way.  Ask yourself what is at the root of that emotion, and what does it mean if you are indeed wrong?  Will the world end? Nope.  Can you learn more and expand as a dancer?  Yes indeed.  So, go forth and be awesome!